互助行为减少、开口求助变难是目前农村的普遍现象。求助行为是互助行为谱系中至关重要的一环。以求助作为突破口，解释农民求助变难的行为逻辑和发生机制，可以拓展深化对互助行为的基本原则和发生机制的理解。互助行为有损益得失和亲疏远近两个基本维度。损益得失讨论人们进行理性分析时使用的标准为何，有刚性指标和弹性指标之分。亲疏远近分析人们在不同边界和意义的社会关系之上，如何作出损益得失的判断，有侧重静态结构的远近和侧重动态变化的亲疏之别。损人利己和不损人利己是互助的两种基本类型。互助行为的发生在损益得失和亲疏远近的共同作用下，受心理成本决定。心理成本的高低，决定了互助行为发生的难易程度。代际关系和邻里关系的变迁正是心理成本变化的例证。

It is common in present rural China that helping behaviors are reducing and asking for help is more embarrassing than before. Help-seeking behaviors are one of the most vital parts in the pedigree of helping behaviors. In order to extend and deepen the understanding of the mechanism and basic principles of helping behaviors, helping-seeking behaviors are taken as a breakthrough to explain the logic of farmers’ behaviors and their mechanism. There are two basic dimensions of helping behaviors: gains and losses, and kindred distance and degree of intimacy. The former discusses the standards used in rational analysis, which can be divided into rigid and elastic indexes. The latter analyses how people judge gains and losses, based on the different social boundaries and meanings of social relationships. Kindred distance and degree of intimacy includes the static structure, that is emphasized in kindred distance, and dynamic change, which is focused on degree of intimacy. Harming others to benefit oneself and not-harming others to benefit oneself are two basic types of helping behaviors. Under the combined effect of gains and losses and kindred distance and degree of intimacy, helping behaviors are determined by psychological cost. It determines the difficulty of helping behaviors. The changes of inter-generation relationship and neighborhood relationship are just illustrations in psychological cost changes.