如“女强人”一词所暗示的，“女性”与“个人成功”之间似乎总是存在着某些摩擦与隔阂。传统话语赋予女性“温柔”、“顺从”等脸谱化期待，与个人 成功所隐含的“竞争”、“好胜”等基调相忤逆，以至女性一旦具有较高的个人 成就，就对人们的惯常认知造成了某种挑战，因而不得不面临质疑与污名。这 一情况表达在教育领域或学校生活里，则为女生身份与高学业追求间阴魂不散 潜在矛盾:西方的研究文献认为，尽管当前学校场域中的“女生优势、男生劣 势”状况早已司空见惯，但高人一等、胜人一筹的地带总归不被看作女性的最 佳归宿，女生在追求优异成绩的过程中依然要面临诸多与性别身份相关的内在 紧张感。“腹有诗书气自华”所表达的和谐，似乎只是人们美好的想象。 在一个充分强调个体自由和解放的社会中，诸如此类的内在紧张感必然不 会被默默忍受，而是会被审视、批判和(尝试)解决。根据西方文献所勾勒的 图景，当代女性正渐渐打破保守思维的枷锁，把“抱负”“成就”等元素融入日 常女性形象之中。虽然这显示了女性主义的可观胜利，但伴随而来的困境也昭 然若揭:当“追求个人成就”的倾向终于被纳入女性形象的一部分时，“表达(传 统化)女性特质”、“展现女性魅力”等保守性要求却并没有被相应地被移除; 同时，在新自由主义强调个人责任、忽略结构性不公的语境下，女性的个人成 功也渐渐从一种可能性演变为一种苛责。由此，现实情况是，女性被要求必须 成为既有个人成就又具女性魅力的“两者都有式”(have it all)全能型选手，且其 中的任何差错都成为个体缺陷的反映。而以上的状况，在最本质的层面上，植 根于在性别二分法思维阴魂不散的掌控力:“男”和“女”的宿命式性别分野依 旧顽固，两性最终受到的是有区别的待遇。女性可以追逐成功，但终究是作为 女性而追逐成功，与之对应的要求和评价、随之而来的收益与风险与男性的不 尽相同。表现在教育体统中——女生被容许追求高学业成就，但终究是作为女 生而追求，“女生优势”也许可以改变人们对女生学业表现的具体认知，却无法 改变人们从性别二分的角度考量学业表现这一事实。性别的粗暴分野在根本上 是一种权力框架，只要权力框架仍在，性别身份就成为个体无以逃脱的行为背 景和命运底色。 对此，有西方学者提出，出于对东方传统文化及教育系统的种种特性(比 如极端强调学习成绩、压抑性别表达)的考虑，有理由假设东方女生也许会在 一定程度上逃脱西方图景中的困境。本研究通过对 14 名女生的回溯性访谈，试 图对这一说法展开探索。研究发现，一方面，被访谈者们的确表现出了有异于 西方图景的对性别之维的冷漠态度，而从这种态度中延伸出了对新自由主义语 境下性别二分法框架的冲击和颠覆倾向。在访谈中，女生们普遍在“性别”议 题上有一种“日常无感”状态;而一旦对性别身份与学业追求之间的矛盾有所 察觉，将更侧重于以后者为主要关注点以及参照系，以学业为代表的自我与自 我发展议题往往超越性别表达;由此，也许可以说，当学业成就占据生活意义 的最高领地，女生将不是作为女生而追求个体成就，而更多地是作为成就的追 求者而思考如何作女生;也即，当环境的要求使得性别之维与个体利益不再严 格攸关，性别之维将在很大程度上失去对个体经验的统摄性控制，由此对两性 的粗暴分野也失落了决定性意义。同时，被访谈者对性别事实以及性别事实所 附带的气质所抱持的态度并不止于冷漠无感、可轻易放弃，而是在很大程度上 将其中介化、工具化和隐喻化，性别之维先是与个体的心灵间有意识地被隔离 开来，之后或是以一种资源的身份被重新发掘，或是被用作一种象征和隐喻， 其自身之于被访谈者而言似乎并不具有本体性的内涵和意义，由此性别之维被 消解和稀释，性别权力框架无以寄托。在这一意义上，腹有诗书，似乎使得“气 华”与否不再重要。 然而与此同时，女生们所表达出的对以二分法为代表的权力框架之颠覆迹 象并不意味着任何改观现实的潜力——当社会对女性全能型的要求逐渐突破教 育系统的保护网络而进入她们的认知时，她们最终会选择自主自愿地遵循;也 就是说，无论意图、过程中表现出多少解放性潜能，从结果上来看，她们最终 仍然甘之如饴地重复着性别权力框架下女性双重枷锁的命运;而更进一步说， 正是之前对性别维度的冷漠和消解趋向，使得接受命运的决定变得更为平淡无 常、波澜不惊，从而拒绝了对现实的任何冲击力。究其根本，被访谈对象对性 别权力框架的冲击是一种非预期性的附加结果，所示的颠覆性来源于外界固有 形势所促发的被动反应，而非任何实质性的挑战和质疑意愿。“诗书”不会自动 向“气华”转化，但苦读诗书者，终将在需要时自愿苦练气质的华美。

As is more or less implied by words such as ‘powerful women’, there always exists certain estrangements between ‘being female’ and ‘being successful’. Characteristics that are assigned to women, be it ‘being tender’ or ‘being beautiful’, are not exactly in line with the tones generally associated with personal achievements, which are more competitiveness and aggressiveness-oriented. This condition often means that in everyday life, women, if aspiring for individual accomplishment, may pose unpleasant challenges to people’s deep-rooted views and are therefore subject to stigma and criticism. In a society where individual agency is intensely promoted, situations as such are bound to be challenged. According to the landscape depicted by western literature, women in contemporary times are gradually breaking down shackles of ancient thoughts and trying to integrate elements such as ‘ambition’ and ‘personal success’ into the daily, taken-for-granted images of women. Although this has in part demonstrated a kind of delightful progress, the dilemma that follows is also clear: when women are finally allowed to pursue achievement which is a modern phenomenon, the rather traditional requirements of ‘being feminine’, ‘being womanly attractive’ are at the same time not eliminated; moreover, within the discourse of neo-liberalism, the possibility of women being successful has become a sort of demand. Therefore, in reality women are required to achieve a ‘have it all’ status, and any failure of achieving that status is seen as personal faults. This situation, essentially, reflects the often-hidden yet overwhelming power of the gender binary: women are allowed to pursue success, but only to do so as women, with a different set of requirements, ways of assessment and therefore ensuring costs, benefits and risks from those of men who pursue success of the exact same kind. As in terms of the educational system: female students are allowed to be academically high-achieving, yet are only able to be so as female students; the so-called ‘girls’ advantages’ phenomenon may be able to change the details of how people think of female students’ academic performance, but is not able to change the essential fact that people think of academic performance from the stubborn perspective of gender binary. At its core, the gender binary is a kind of power structure, and as long as it still exists one’s gender identity will remain as a kind of inescapable fate. Regarding this, western scholars have proposed that owing to certain characteristics of the oriental culture as well as that of the special educational system, there are reasons to believe that female students in the East may be expected to show 5 some deviation from the above-mentioned condition. By interviewing 14 female students and asking them to tell their stories retrospectively, this thesis aims to explore this assumption. As was shown by the evidence, on the one hand, the participants have indeed displayed a kind of indifferent attitudes towards ‘gender’, and therefore there exhibits strong potential to challenge the gender binary and therefore the gender hierarchy represented by it. More specifically, in the interviews the participants all have shown a bit of ‘daily indifference’ towards gender, and once gender identity was seen to interfere with their academic achievement, the former will be put aside and the latter saved and focused on. That is, the development of the self, as is represented and betoken by academic achievements, is prioritized over and in a way transcends the concerns related to gender. Thus it can be said that when academic achievements occupies the highest power, female students will no longer be considering how to pursue success based on the fact that they are female students, but will instead be considering how to be female students based on the fact that they are high-achievers. That is to say, when the specific traits and requirements of a certain environment has resulted in gender being less relevant to people’s development, gender as a dimension will largely lose its predominant power on individual’s experiences, and it follows that gender binary will lose its fundamental meanings. At the same time, we should also be aware of the sad fact that the potential of challenging status quo will not eventually be transferred into any real actions. It was clear that once the ‘have it all’ demand has breaks through the protective nets of the educational system and entered their minds, the participants would voluntarily opt for the conformist manner. However much potential they have shown in terms of intentions and processes, from the perspective of outcomes they will still be repeating the destiny well designed by the gender hierarchy. To go a step forward, it is exactly the inclination to be indifferent to the gender dimension which once has constituted a disruptive force, that renders the eventual accepting of gendered fate a lot more normal and uneventful. Fundamentally speaking, the disruptive signs are merely reflective of a kind of unintended consequences created randomly by a certain circumstances, not any real, substantial will of challenging or making a difference.